The [*Firewall* trailer](http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/firewall/) opens with chilling voiceovers from Harrison Ford. “*Someone’s been trying to hack in and compromise my identity… You think somebody got my information off the internal network?*”

Do members of the lay public grok *Firewall*’s vision of computer security? I buy into the Vegas of [*Ocean's Eleven*](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0240772/) and the medicine of [*Grey's Anatomy*](http://abc.go.com/primetime/greysanatomy/), but it’s because I’m hopelessly unfamiliar with gambling and biology.

So does non-geekhood allow one to suspend their disbelief enough to enjoy this flick? To believe that the process of [identity theft](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Identity_theft) is simply “hacking in” to some single master database maintained by who-knows-who? That a victim would be aware of *attempts* to perform this feat when it hasn’t yet seen success? Read on…

I don’t normally use this space to express negative opinions, but I’m making an exception for the Low Fat Yogurt commercial from Tim Hortons.

The advertisement in question is not simply annoying, it is *offensive*.

A trim, red-haired woman is featured, enjoying a fruit and yogurt cup on a couch. A small crowd gathers outside the window, presumably to observe her consuming the treat.

On seeing these people, she assumes the look of a trapped animal. “It’s low fat,” she pleads, eyes wide, “It’s *low fat*!” Read on…

Ever since Dave Shea [linked to them](http://www.mezzoblue.com/archives/2005/11/10/pizza_and_pa/), I’ve been fascinated by [John Langdon's Ambigrams](http://www.johnlangdon.net/ambigrams.html).

I got his book Wordplay for Christmas, which is a fascinating series of new ambigrams, interspersed with philosophical musings and other treats.

Mike

Looking at my DVD library, I’ve pretty much come to terms with my tastes: drama, intrigue, and witty relationship comedy. Action just doesn’t do it for me. And horror *definitely* doesn’t do it for me.

Case: [Minority Report](http://imdb.com/title/tt0181689/). For an “action” movie, we’ve only three major action sequences, and all of them border on the ridiculous. A runaway jetpack that grills hamburgers? A factory that builds a car with Tom Cruise alive and kicking inside it? A “flush the tank” lever that no one knew about until the moment a hero needed a quick getaway? Read on…

First [Firefly](http://www.fireflywiki.org/), then [Wonderfalls](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonderfalls), and now… [Veronica Mars](http://www.marsinvestigations.net/). Finally I’m hooked on a show that hasn’t been axed by FOX!

Nancy Drew, with a murder, a rape, a missing parent, and a corrupt sheriff. And the most hard-boiled 17-year-old you’re ever likely to meet. Read on…

TiVo, in a recent publicity stunt, held a [mock funeral for the VCR](http://news.com.com/TiVo+buries+the+VCR/2100-1038_3-5895835.html).

But they might as well have burned cable and satellite boxes, too. Because television is broken. Broken compared to the Internet.

The web is vast; far bigger than 83 channels of cable. But it’s a completely different model. It’s 100% on-demand. Read on…

Fictional stories, in my mind, all fall somewhere along a line connecting two broad categories:

1. Everyday life, and
2. The extraordinary.

Dramas are closer to #1, while fantasies (the “fantastic”) are almost by-definition #2. The truly mundane is not exciting at all, but when events become _too_ unbelievable, we lose our ability to connect with them. Read on…

I don’t know what it is about me.

As a child, I was never permitted to watch TV outside of the Olympics and Grandpa’s house — maybe that was it. Or maybe it’s that I’ve never lived in a house with cable. I don’t know. Either way, I’ve developed an odd taste in prime-time television.

For starters, I love ‘Grounded For Life’. The premise of it is that it’s two parents who were married basically at seventeen and they now have a teenage daughter and two younger sons, but are still themselves in their early thirties. Maybe it’s the script, maybe it’s the actors, I’m not sure. I just find the situations and editing to be brilliant. Perhaps they’re setups that first existed on a far-superior sitcom ages and ages ago, but the recycling doesn’t bother me — I never saw whatever the original was!

The other show that’s awesome is ‘Just Shoot Me’, and I think that’s mainly because David Spade is hilarious. Now I never saw ‘Joe Dirt’, and I expect it’s as bad as the reviews said it was, but the guy was great as the voice of Cuzco in ‘The Emperor’s New Groove’. And he’s always funny on JSM.

I guess a large part of the challenge of coming up with a good sitcom is the setting. Shows like ‘Friends’ and ‘Seinfeld’ set themselves in Apartmentland, USA… but now that they’ve gone and done that, it’s kind of a hard act to follow. And hence we have sitcoms like ‘Just Shoot Me’, which takes place in the offices of fictitious fashion magazine ‘Blush’, for which Dennis (Spade) is a photographer.

Of course, at the base of any show is the writing — and the dozens of shows out there cancelled after the first episode are testament to that. I remember seeing a lot of promotion on the WB for a new show called ‘The Help’. Was that ever a train wreck. Gosh, I think they must have cancelled it during the first commercial break.

Anyhow, I think ‘Just Shoot Me’ and ‘Grounded For Life’ are both targeted more at the female teen demographic, but I feel secure enough to enjoy them nevertheless. Them and ‘Legally Blonde’ and ‘Emma’ and whatever other chick flicks I’ve digested over the years without putting on a great show of vomiting for the full running-time.

Mike

I don’t normally watch TV early in the week, so I (perhaps thankfully) haven’t seen any of Superstar between the premiere and tonight’s show, the finale.

What a brilliant concept, though, the same twisted mindset that brought us all My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance.

The true brilliance of Superstar isn’t just that they’re looking for a terrible singer, it’s that they’re looking for a terrible singer who is awesome in their own mind. Perhaps that makes the whole joke all the more cruel, but it’s interesting to see how even someone with no pitch or sense of rhythm can have a truly likable flair when they’re geniunely trying and believe in themselves.

I guess that’s just a great big fat cliche, but I think it’s true — and certainly a show like this is a good study in it.

Mike